By Scott Shaw
I was the only customer shopping
in a small boutique shop the other day. There were two employees in the shop having a heated
discussion. I could not help but
overhear their words. The one, a man, was stating that he believed that it was
the fault of the immoral policies of the United States government that had
unjustly imprisonment suspected terrorists at the prison at Guantanamo
Bay and due to the harsh conditions they were forced to undergo, with no
hope of a fair trail or release, that it was the fault of the United States
government that some of these prisoners had committed suicide. The female employee argued that these people
were simply mentally ill and, if they were not, they would have not committed
suicide. The argument went back and
forth with no end in sight until the man said, “Well, if you believe that, that means that you’re not a Christian.”
Throughout
all levels of society this type of statement comes into play when a person is
not getting their way in a conversation and/or argument. It is kind of like
embracing the philosophy of, “Well, since
you won’t agree with my point of view, I will simply kick you below the belt,
to get my point across.”
Why is this style of dialogue
added to a discussion, because from this style of rhetoric, the topic
completely changes. The female employee exclaimed, “What! I’m not a Christian! No, you’re the one who isn’t a Christian!”
Ultimately
this is the sad reality about opinions that equal discussions that ultimately
lead to arguments—people what to talk.
They want to say what they believe.
They want their point to be accepted. They want everyone else to embrace
their philosophy. And, they want their
opinion to be accepted as RIGHT by the masses. When it is not, then the rules
of discourse go out the window and it becomes every man (or women) for
themselves.
Why Participate
The
ultimate question you have to ask yourself is, “Why should I participate in this style of discourse at all?”
Certainly, throughout life, we have all disagreed with what other people have
said. For example, I was recently at a
party in Orange County California. For those of you who are not familiar with
that region of the country, it is commonly understood to be a bastion of
Caucasian Republican conservatism. I was sitting with a couple of friends at a
table and a person came up, sat down, and blatantly began to state as fact that
the reason gas prices were going up again was because it was a secret plan of
Obama. I said, “No, it is because of
world market demands and the speculation of investors.” Another person
chimed stating that he was expecting Armageddon to occur any day now because
Obama had been elected president and Obama was destroying the way the world
views the United States. In disbelief I inquired, “What do you think W. did?”
The two
ultra conservatives began to exchange agreeing banter. The three liberals,
myself included, got up and left the conversation.
We Each Have Our Opinions
We each have our opinion. Some of our opinions are based on fact and
some are based in belief. But, most people already have their minds made up
about what they do and do not believe. It is for this reason that, for the most
part, intellectual discussions among people of differing mindsets rarely prove
anything. For example, try to argue with
a Christian, detailing the facts of the true history of Christianity to them,
and you will run into a brick wall of denial of facts. First you will be told, “It is all based in faith. And, faith is what our lord expects of
us.” Then, if you still carrying on
the discussion, you will ultimately be told, “By the way, you know you are going to Hell for being a nonbeliever.”
This life-fact of differing
opinions is the basis for all elements of conflict. So, first and foremost, before you even enter
into one of these heated discussions, you have to decide, are you will to
entering into a conflict. If you are,
you must first understand, that conflicts only end one way—there is a winner
and there is a loser. Now, the person of war may be willing to pay this price
and live their life by this standard.
But, this is emphatically NOT the spiritual way. The spiritual way is a path
of peace and positivity—though so many so-called spiritual people forget this
fact when attempting to defend their ideology.
But the debative conflict of life
is much more subtle that this. At the heart of all debate is the ideology of
one person who has instigated the verbal confrontation. From that one person,
the debate grows and grows and grows. But, no matter how big it gets, it is
based upon the ideology of one person. And, what that person is propagating is
most commonly based on attacking the thoughts and actions of another person or
person(s).
Schadenfreude
It is
somewhat like the German term, “Schadenfreude,”
which can be translated in several ways but basically it refers to the fact
that a person or persons takes joy in another person’s demise or fall from
grace. People who embrace this mindset look down upon the accomplishments of
another and, in fact, find accomplishment a reason and motivation to denigrate
and criticize people.
For whatever reason, people love
to congregate in their own negativity. They love to band together and find a
place where their voice of negativity can be heard and embraced. Some may say
that this is a human condition. But, I
don’t believe that to be the case. The
only reason that a person or person(s) may relish the demise of another is
based in the fact that a negatively-based person has not achieved the level of
accomplishment or success they have desired in their chosen field. Or, if they have achieved a certain level of
success, they feel that by bringing another person down they have become
superior. But, higher and lower is all foolishness. Less or more is all a state
of mind. And, less or more, higher or
lower, is never a concept embraced by the truly spiritual individual.
From a personal perspective I
have seen this many times. Someone will contact me being very friendly—most
commonly based upon the fact that they want something from me. Then, sometime
later, I will find that this same person is speaking or writing very hash
things about me, most commonly based upon lies and falsehoods.
Why do people choose to behave in
this fashion? Because that is the mindset they have ultimately chosen to
embrace. They have entered a space of negativity. And, this goes on throughout the world
constantly. Think about it, how many people have you heard speaking negatively
about someone they do not even know and have never met? The problem with this mindset and reaction
based mentality is all that it produces is a nonsensical waste of LIFE TIME and
LIFE ENGERY.
The question to ask yourself, if
you find yourself embracing a negative mentality is, “Do you feel good when you criticize others? Does it make you a better
person? Does it make the world a better
place?” The answer will almost
universally be, “No.”
What behaving in this manner
actually equals is that you are not contributing to the Greater-Good of this
place we call Life. Instead, if you are following this negative level of human
consciousness, you are not contributing to the betterment; you are only trying
to destroy. And, destruction on any level is a negative pathway.
Think about the people you have
admired. Do they follow a path of negativity or do they provide the world with
a positive service? Think about the
people who have made major contribution to the world. Are they negative and critical? Are they
constantly involving themselves in criticism, arguments, and negative
debates? No, they are probably not.
No matter what field they are in,
what they do is to do what they do. They continue to learn and grow as an
individual, and follow a path that leads to the betterment of the themselves
and the world. They turn away from confrontations; verbal or to there wise.
This is the path to making a positive contribution to the world.
In the Words
So, you enter into a space where
people are embracing negative dialogue - either about a subject, a person,
religions, politics, or whatever. Do you
stay and take part in that? Argue your
point until you make everybody believe as you believe? Does your dialogue continue until you are
both so agitated that you end up in a physical confrontation? Or do you walk
away? You must understand that if you remain in debate, all you are actualizing
is the revamping of meaningless banter and discourse. Yes, you may have your
opinion, based on fact or fiction—we all do.
Yes, you may like or dislike a person who is in the spotlight, based it
whatever ideology. But, as long as you
are taking about them, all you are doing is adding to their notoriety. It is kind of like the fact that Andy Warhol
never read the reviews written by his critics; all he did was measure how big
the printed discourse was.
What this means is that you are
either becoming you and becoming more.
Or, you are not. If you are not,
and constantly engaged in debate that all you are doing is basing your life
upon the actions and achievements of other people.
You can be an armchair
quarterback and talk, blog, or write, (good and bad), all you want about
another person or another person’s philosophy.
But, if you are doing this, all you are actually doing is paying tribute
to that person. And, if you are following this life course, then you must ask
yourself what does it equal and how it is causing you to become more, better,
and achieve what you truly desire?
So, argue if you want. Stay in the debate if you must. Hit below the belt if that is the only way
you can win an argument. But, ultimately what does that say about you? And, more importantly, if you live your life
at this level, what will be left when you have exited this place we call
Life. Will you have left a positive
legacy? Or, simply a plethora of forgotten
conversations based on opinions.
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